Archive for the ‘Liars’ Category

The Road Not Taken

Hello.

For eight years I have managed not to post on 9/11.  That’s not to say I don’t read everything that is posted by others. I feel that anything I could say about that day would be inadequate at best. How many words can we use to describe the desecration and horror Americans lived through? So many words have already been used. And I am word poor on the subject.

Today in class Teachers chose to show a documentary about Firefighters who were trapped in one of the collapsing buildings but somehow managed to live through the ordeal. I was trapped in the class. I was not at liberty to leave.  I tried very hard not to watch the video and covered up my aversion by getting students to pay attention. I was a hypocrite. I couldn’t help it. Unlike the students, I was fully aware during that day and the days after it. It is still a moment in history I cannot confront without pain. To have watched people choosing to throw themselves off the buildings rather than burn to death is something I cannot put out of my mind when the footage is shown. The horror of listening to people scream when the buildings came down  haunted me for a very long time.  The silence of the skies afterward is something that I hope to never live through again. I still cheer when a plane flies overhead with a great rumbling sound. I marvel at the trails they leave against the blue sky and am grateful.

Why am I writing today?  Because I have been avoiding not just the pain, but the anger that came with that day. And the anger is not entirely directed at those who engineered that horror and then danced afterward. It is directed at our government and how they took advantage of the fear and sorrow of a nation. The lies they told to ensure that we remained in a state of panic so that they could persue other objectives that had nothing to do with what happened. And how we are still locked in the trap they set for us. A nation at war with ourselves.

Instead of following a course of action that would yield positive results from a terrible situation,  our government chose to go to war against countries that had little or nothing to do with the actual act perpetrated. Wars we are still fighting. Instead of burying the dead, we added to the body count. And it’s still rising. Bush, Cheney, Rice, Rumsfeld, Ashcroft, Wolfowitz and Powell are walking around free and men and women are still dying. And the reason we were given for these wars no longer holds. They WMD farce, which had nothing to do with the destruction of two buildings in New York City, has already been exposed.

To this day I don’t believe that we are actively pursuing an enemy so much as an agenda. A monetary agenda. Because let’s face it, three thousand Americans lost their lives and a great many unscrupulous companies made money. A lot of money. Halliburton, Blackwater, Lockheed Martin, Boeing… to name a few. The government awarded lucrative contracts to private prisons to lock up undesirables. The banks and private investors took advantage of a nation whose attention was riveted  elsewhere. In eight years, we became not  the beacon of freedom and tolerance we should have been  but a byword for greed and stupidity. We became the international icon for lies and a haven for charlatans.  Where we could have emerged from 9/11 stronger, wiser and unbeaten, we allowed the pundits to convince us that everyone is out to get us. We began to fight amongst ourselves. Instead of banding together, we fractured. This is the legacy we have given ourselves. And we built it on the graves of firefighters and emergency personnel who died trying to help in a moment of hopelessness.

To this day I am ashamed of where we allowed ourselves to be led. It is my undying belief that those thousands of innocent people deserved better than what we have now become. A nation of backbiters and bickering fools who care more about what an uneducated pundit screams  than confronting a terrible truth. That, in our fear,  we helped our lawmakers create this mess.   The 9/11 victims deserve to be remembered not once a year, but every time a law is made, a deal is brokered or a lobbyist starts talking.

And the only ones who have the true power to ensure that this happens is you and I. When are we going to use it?

Dogwoman

Hey You, Out There On Your Own…

Hello.

If you go to a town hall meeting to shout and scream, listen up.

Your rights are not being violated when you are called out on your behaviour. In point of fact, when your unruly actions shut down an otherwise calm discussion, you are violating the rights of those around you. You, Mr. Town Hall Screaming and Spitting Guy, are essentially in the wrong.

The Town Hall meetings are supposed to be informational. And Senators are not required to have them. They are a courtesy to constituents. Something we saw none of during King Bush’s Reign of Ignorance. That we are, as taxpayers, being offered the chance to hear facts about the proposed bill and decide for ourselves how we feel about it is actually kind of nice.

Not being able to engage in a discussion because some random is pushing an agenda, not so nice.

Are the disruptions being organized and funded by third parties? It wouldn’t surprise me one bit. It’s the oldest tactic in the book(cough TammanyHallcough). Disinformation through disruption is a very old and effective political trick. But that’s all it is , a trick.

The use of these disruptive practices; false information, misleading statements of fact, is killing the necessary overhaul of the American health care system. Palin’s ridiculous and damning assertion that the proposed bill would put her Downs baby to death is nearing the criminal. Particularly since she probably has the means to afford proper life long care for her child. What if she didn’t ? What if she was working a minimum wage job and trying to pay for medical care out of pocket because her employer was getting around the health care benefit requirement by only giving her 38 hours a week instead of forty? Or she was denied access to necessary care because the child was born with a pre-existing condition? I’ll bet she would be singing a whole other tune.

These are the people who are being hurt by the current system. The ones who need the reform.

Not Palin. Not Republican middle class screamers. Not insurance companies.

Let’s face it, the health care industry makes an assload of  profit. It’s only right that they would throw a temper tantrum when someone tries to rein them in a little. That doesn’t mean they are in the right. It doesn’t mean they are free to disrupt and derail the democratic process.

Whether or not we agree with the proposed bill, people at least have the right to hear about it.

No one has the right to shout insults or scream until they silence the understandable curiosity of another person.

No one has the right to bring guns to what should be a rational disscussion, regardless of their right to carry concealed. This is an implied threat.

And  why aren’t those who are using Twitter  to issue these threats of retaliation and violence at Town Hall meetings (and they are legion) being arrested?

Dogwoman

No More Jobs?

Hello.

Of all things the news spews I think the most underrated are the stories about Steve Jobs health.

Though I consider him just one step away from being the Anti-Christ, he is still human. However, he is a human who has lied through his teeth to shareholders. First it was ” No, no, I’m fine.”  Then it was “Oh well. I am on a special diet.”  Then, of course, “Oh I might have had a touch of the Cancer but I’m good now.”

Now he’s had his liver transplant which is probably an extension of the pancreatic cancer he never told anyone about.

Well bully for you, Stevie.

Why shareholders aren’t more ticked is beyond me. The entire company rests on the charisma of the grand poohbah of technology and he hasn’t the cajones to just tell the frickin’ truth. Sure he’ll mass market a ‘business plan’  that smacks of profiteering but he won’t tell the truth to the people who probably should know he’s going to drop any minute.

And he could. Pancreatic cancer is  one of  the most devastating and aggressive cancers. I watched a friend go from diagnosis to death in three weeks. It doesn’t just go “Oh you’re Steve Jobs? Sorry man, I’ll go now” It’s a hanger arounder. A, slip into your other organs and have a party, kind of cancer. It likes to travel. A lot. So give it a few months I’m sure we’ll hear about a new ‘special diet’ Jobs is on. Right before they take him in for another transplant.

 

Dogwoman

The King (or Queen) of Smears

Hello.

I know you’ve been waiting with bated ( not”baited” CNN reporter person, as in “abated” or withheld. When are they going to offer me your job because even with my crap spelling I can get most of the grammar right. Maybe you should be working for Fox News) breath for this announcement.

I know who I’m going to vote for. I decided last night while watching the political ads on T.V. I will vote for every candidate, regardless of party affiliation, who effectively and completely smears or degrades their opponent.

This is my reasoning.

First, if one is willing to expose every dirty little secret of an opponent in order to win a job in which one will undoubtedly be hated by a majority of the people in a state or throughout the country, you have the kind of balls we need right now.

Secondly, if one is the kind of person who can take innocent friendships and turn them into sinister affiliations that stop just short of canoodling with the Devil himself, well that takes a great deal of creativity, which we also need. Any President can clandestinely re-write the Constitution. It takes real commitment to creatively change someone’s background right out where people can see it.

Lastly, if  one is willing to lay all the blame on the shoulders of another person and repeatedly call them a liar until people believe it without question, then one has the kind of superficial charm we the people have been searching for. And if one can do it with out mixing metaphors or making verbal gaffes that cause the world wide web to post them to YouTube on the comedy channel, you are our man or woman.

So there you are: Balls, creativity and just enough charm to make it all go down easier. These are the characteristics our government has been lacking for eight years. And I am willing to help make sure they again rise to the top of the dung heap we call American Government.

Join me won’t you, in ensuring that every smarmy, soulless bastard with a seven figure income and no idea how public transportation works leads our Country back to the glory days.

Amen.

Dogwoman

Bailout, Schmailout.

Hello.

I’ve managed to slip my chemical leash and I am back, ready to kick some politician butt. Rendition, my Aunt Fanny.

Just kidding. I’ve been stuck playing the never-ending literary quiz over at Goodreads.com. I just wanted to sound all spyish and less like a complete dork.

To the topic at hand: Bailout Bill.

Complete load of hooey. Expensive hooey at that.

Why would We the People want to reward greedy men and women for ignoring the warnings that have been going on for over a decade? We were told repeatedly in the early nineties that if the credit industry was not reined in this would happen. Guess what? They were right! Surprise! And since the explosion of monetary gain has been by the top three percent, why would the other 97% of us want to work harder to pay off their debt ? We don’t, so suck it Congress. We are already working like dogs just to maintain the little we have. Under no circumstances should we allow the richest people in the country to pass their debt to us. The ‘lower’ classes do not exist as a slave class to take on the burden of the greed of the upper classes.

Also, as long as I am ranting mindlessly, let me say something that has been making my fur stand on end. Why are they blaming low-income homeowners for this debacle?  There were programs instituted by Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac that allowed for sustainable home-ownership for lower income families. At the time of their inception these programs were used to revitalize neighborhoods and were taken on by working class families in an economic environment that allowed people to work and see a return on that work. As mass layoffs began and income to living wage ratios fell in the last eight years, those families began to struggle under the weight of a top heavy economy. They did not, as has been postulated, take on mortgages they could not afford. They took on mortgages they could afford until gas prices, due to excessive profits, risky investments, and speculation began to spiral out of control. This spiral has led to outrageous increases in pricing for everything throughout the country. And the mass foreclosures began.

The biggest drain on our economy has been the two wars we are concurrently waging. But it seems no one wants to mention that. They’d rather point to those who can least defend themselves and blame them.

Well, I blame those who,even after the lessons learned in the Savings and Loan disaster, began creating private equity firms and hedge funds. Those two things helped spur the original financial meltdown in the 80’s. Because of  a government bail out then, the greedy bastards ignored warnings and started up all over again. Those same people should be forced to declare bankruptcy.

They should be required to be punished for their actions. Not rewarded for the pandemic of greed that has sent our country into a tailspin.

If you’d like to urge your Senator to vote no on the Bailout Bill, go here to find out who they are and send them an e-mail. If they get enough mail it might crash their system.

I’ll bet they’d get the point then.

Dogwoman

The Dog’s Advice

Hello.

Dear Dogwoman,

I am a woman in my mid forties with a busy family including the arrival of a new grandchild by my seventeen year old unmarried daughter. I am also currently running for the Vice-Presidential slot in the next election. My question is: How do I balance these responsibilities in the face of a media onslaught?

-just a barracuda

Dear Barracuda,

Being a working mom can be tough. With so many different jobs during the day one can become overwhelmed. My advice is to fly back to your home state as quickly as possible and not come out again until November 8th. This way the media has nothing to talk about and most voters will forget who you are. An air of mystery can be a good thing during a political campaign. As I always say, leave ’em guessing because confusion is always the best weapon.

Dogwoman

Dear Dogwoman,

I recently announced my Vice Presidential pick. It seemed like a good idea at the time, now however, I am having second thoughts. Apparently this chick has some unfinished business she forgot to mention during the vetting process, like a little legal problem called Trooper-Gate. Even though she is trying to avoid testifying I am afraid it will come back to bite both of us in the ass. How do I get her to dropout without looking bad?

-running on empty

Dear Running,

All of us make mistakes from time to time. It is best to try not to make them in the public eye. And definitely best not to get caught making them on YouTube.  With this in mind, once the mistake is made one must learn to live with it. I am afraid that if you bounce this person now you will look like an even bigger ass than you currently do. Best just to smile into the cameras and talk up your choice as much as possible. If you say something enough people will begin to believe it, even if it is an outright lie.

Dogwoman

Dearest Dog Woman,

We are a group of International Foreign Ministers. Recently, we had a meeting during which one of our esteemed members proposed that as a bit of fun we vote for the next U.S. President amongst ourselves.  We did, it was a laugh and things went forward. Now, unfortunately we are all being hounded, Diana-style, by the international media to reveal the winner. How do we get these vultures to back off?

_Ministers for Change

Dear Ministers,

Admit openly that your choice was Barack Obama, even if it wasn’t, and they will leave you alone.

Dogwoman

Dear Dogwoman,

I was recently fired from a news job. Well, fired is a bit extreme, more like downgraded. All because I let my opinions be known openly. And because the person they paired me with is a right wing blow hard with no morals to speak of. Seriously, this guy would sell his grandmother for air time. Is it my fault the Unites States government is full of crooked bastards with their collective grubby hands in the cookie jar? I think not. Anywho, now my employer is mad and refuses to let me finish commenting on the upcoming election. The question at large is this : How do I get back at these numb-skulls without losing my job completely?

-slave to the man

Dear Slave,

You have a serious problem. Normally I would blithely dispense advice but honestly. You should know better than to hold left leaning opinions in a world where Fox “my ticker tape is always misspelled and no one cares” News rules the roost. Right wingers, Republicans and your mother -in-law will now berate and scorn you for not being ‘neutral’ in a world where no one is neutral. The best advice I can come up with is, either continue soapboxing for the Liberals and hope Obama wins or rapaciously suck up to every Republican political figure you can. At this point neither action can do much harm. Good luck.

Dogwoman

You Don’t Say

Hello.

What? The Georgia Bigfoot thing was a hoax? No way. It can’t be. It seemed so real to me.

Bigfoot is to real as George Bush’s version of Democracy is to freedom.

Dogwoman