Posts Tagged ‘U2’

Jaysus, Shut It Already

Hello.

I have ten minutes to write this morning.

Bono is back in the news whining yet again about illegal downloads. If I was reading his dreck correctly, he thinks that the Music Industry should become like China and restrict music access. Yes Bono, we should. No one should be allowed to download your crap music without a permit certifying that they should be certified.

Has it occurred to anyone in the music industry that it might not be illegal downloads but poor quality of music that is killing their industry? Maybe if they produced musicians rather than faces with digital enhancement people might buy their product. I think they should blame themselves. Not everyone likes Rap or Rythm and Blues. Or people who steal bits of old music and mess with it a bit and call it ‘new’. It’s not new. It’s theft.

Bono complaining about music theft is foolish. Especially if one listens to Televisions’ Marquee Moon and then compares it to U2’s first album Boy. They are strangely similar. Explain that one Bono.

Nevermind, do us all a favor. Just shut it, please.

I did say please.

Dogwoman

U2 vs. Coldplay: Wankers and All Their Friends

Hello.

I could write about how this nefarious “Cash for Clunkers” program is using taxpayer dollars (which we don’t have) to artificially inflate car sales and gouge the Auto Repair industry. OR, I could write about how clashes among our Lawmakers are causing a potentially helpful reform of health care to die a slow, gasping, horrible, horrible death.

But because I am not really that deep, I’d rather talk about Bono calling Chris Martin a wanker on BBC radio.

Ah hahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Ahem.

The fun part of the whole thing for me is not really the whole pot and kettle theme. It’s the reaction from various fans. If one is young and only recently discovered U2 ,  they are the greatest band EVAR and Chris Martin is indeed a wanker. If you are slightly older (just out of your teen years ) then Coldplay is the greatest band EVAR and Bono is the wanker. What fun!

Comments on a variety of sites run the whole gamut, up to and including insulting Martin’s choice of life partner. People take their music seriously.

Yet, who can take their choices seriously.

I can’t listen to U2. Bono, aside from annoying the crap out  me for the last fifteen years, has shredded his voice. He cannot sing anymore. It’s like Dylan,  after the accident. Their last good album and by good I mean, quality over quantity, was Achtung Baby. Period.

Coldplay is running the U2 playbook so well they even hired Eno to help with their new album. Their fourth album. Just like U2 did for The Unforgettable Fire, their Fourth album. Let’s run through the list: Crazy frontman who will say or do anything? Check. Rest of the band barely speaks ? Check. Hawking a ‘humanitarian’ agenda while in fact engaging in a business that is so populated with greedy bastards it will sue poor college students for illegal downloads? Check.

Is Bono really Martin’s friend and it was all a joke? Who cares. Watching the fans of both bands engage in a mud slinging contest over it is so entertaining, I find myself glued to the Net. It’s like watching an episode of Big Brother. You know you ought to be ashamed of yourself but the people involved are so ridiculous that you can’t look away.

The only aspect I find interesting is that despite every freaking newspaper in the world reprinting this dross, I can’t seem to find an article where Martin responds to Bono’s rather poor attempt at either humor or thinly veiled jealousy. Not a one.

C’mon Chris, say something. Anything. Call Bono a name or apologize for him. I just want to see your fans to start taking out ads in the New York Times highlighting what a crap person Bono has become. Then U2 fans can take out ads in Vanity Fair ripping you to pieces. If we work at it, maybe we could get both sides to start a spontaneous mud wrestling contest outside your next venue. ‘Cause nothing says ‘serious musicians at work’ than a bunch of  hormonal wack jobs screaming insults and beating the crap out of each other. Good times.

For the record, not that it is in anyway relevant to this post, but, artistically speaking, Coldplay’s new album kicks U2’s new album in the balls and calls it wanker. Sorry U2, guess you should have held on to Eno.

Dogwoman